when it comes to actual experience all this instruction goes by the wayside.

28th of Teves 5721 [1961]

I received your recent letter and the previous one. Needless to say, I was somewhat taken aback by the tone of your letter. It is a good illustration of how it is possible for a person to read and to learn and to receive instruction from books and teachers, and yet when it comes to actual experience all this instruction goes by the wayside.

I refer to the things which you have surely learned in the books of mussar [ethics] and especially Chassidus about the tactics of the Yetzer Hora (evil inclination) to instill a spirit of depression, discouragement and despondency in order to prevent the Jewish person from fulfilling his Divine mission. This is the most effective approach.
If the Yetzer Hora would attempt to dissuade a person directly from fulfilling his mission, he would not be easily misled. However, instead, the Yetzer tries to discourage the person in all sorts of ways, using "pious" arguments which unfortunately often prove effective at least in some degree.

This is exactly what has happened in your case and I am surprised that you do not realize it. The proof is that from the information I have received I can see that you have accomplished a great deal more than you imagine...

Let me also add another important and essential consideration. You surely know of the saying of the Baal Shem Tov that a soul comes down to live on this earth for a period of 70 to 80 years for the sole purpose to do another Jew a single favour, materially or spiritually. In other words, it is worthwhile for a Jewish soul to make that tremendous journey and descent from heaven to earth in order to do something once for a fellow Jew. In your case the journey was only from the U.S.A. to..., and can in no way be compared to the journey of the soul from heaven to earth; and however pessimistic you may feel, even the Yetzer Hora would have to agree that you have done not only a single favour but numerous good deeds, and even only your work with the children of the Gan [kindergarten] would have justified it.

Considering further that every beginning is difficult especially where there is a change of place and environment, language, etc., and yet the beginning has proved so successful, so one is surely justified in expecting that as time goes on and the initial difficulties are minimized and overcome, there will be a more than corresponding improvement in the good accomplishments.

As for your mentioning the fact that no one seems interested in your work, etc., surely you will admit that G-d, whose knowledge and providence extends to everyone individually, knows and is interested in what you are doing, especially as you are working in the field of education of Jewish children, boys and girls, which is so much emphasized in the Torah. After all, to teach children to make a beracha [blessing] and to say the prayers, etc., this is living Yiddishkeit [Judaism]. (I need hardly add too that I am interested in your work). If it seems to you that it has been left to you to "carry the ball"
yourself, it is surely only because there is confidence in you and that since you have been sent to . . . you undoubtedly have the ability, qualifications, and initiative to do your job without outside prompting, etc.

Since one is only human, it is not unusual to relapse occasionally into a mood of discouragement. But as has been explained in the [book of] Tanya and in other sources, such a relapse should only serve as a challenge to bring forth additional inner reserves and energy to overcome the tactics of the Yetzer Hora and to do ever better than before.

I trust that since you wrote your letter, your mood and outlook have considerably improved and that this letter will find you in a completely different frame of mind. Nevertheless, I am sending you this letter since one is only human and subject to changes of mind as mentioned above.

Finally I want to say that the above should not be understood to mean that if you do find yourself in such a frame of mind you should try to conceal it and not write about it, for our Sages say that "when someone has an anxiety he should relate it to others" for getting something off one's chest is a relief in itself. One should also bear in mind, as the Old Rebbe has stated most emphatically in the laws of learning and teaching Torah, that a person who is engaged in teaching children should especially take care of his health since it directly affects the success of his work. I trust therefore that you are looking after yourself in matters of diet and rest, etc., and that you will always be in a state of cheerfulness and gladness.